It Wasn't Me.

The boy.

He is so effing funny..it's unreal sometimes.

I was inside watching a movie. It was nice out, so I had the patio door and blinds open.

The boy and his friend were outside playin. They decide (for whatever reason) to come in. They are in the boy's room playin video games.

There is a knock at the door. I yell for the boy to get the door because I know it's one of his little friends. They knock at the door all damn weekend. My friends just walk in. It's just like that.

So..the boy gets the door..and I hear some chatting and he shuts the door. Locks it. Deadbolts it. and locks the hinge lock at the top. He walks past me. Shuts the patio door. Locks it. And closes the blinds. LOL!!!

I ask the boy what he is doing. He says 'nothing'. I smile at him, shake my head, and chuckle. The boy is in some shit, I think to myself.

Not 2 minutes later. A knock at the door. The boy comes haulin'ass out of his room..I'll get it..he yells!

Nah, that's okay..I got it, I tell him. I open the door..and standing there are 2 of the neighborhood girls.

**They are 10 and 13. They are sisters. I don't like them.
Their dad uses the N word. In public.
All. the. time. I prefer the boy to stay away from them.
I heard one of them referring to the boy as "hot"..Aw, hell naw!
My baby is not HOT. He is 9!. **

Older girl demands: The boy needs to come outside.

me: Why is that?

her: Because..he called someone a name yesterday..and I took the blame.

me: Took the blame from who?

her: LaVonte...The boy called Lavonte the B-word.

me: A bitch?

her (whining): yes, and LaVonte wants to beat ME up...and I want the boy to come out and tell LaVonte that HE called him that name..and not me.

me: Did LaVonte hear the boy call him a bitch? Who the hell is LaVonte, anyway?

her: no...someone told him, I don't know who he is. He is in 8th grade.

me: did you hear the boy call LaVonte a bitch?

her: no..

me: Oh no. You ain't settin' my baby up. Hang on a minute.

I go inside, shut the door, and call the boy.
me: Did YOU call some boy a bitch, yesterday?
TB: ummmmmmmmmmmmmm. nooooooooooooooooooooooo.
me: are your sure?
TB: I'm shuuuuuuuuuuuuuurr.
me: Then why the hell is this girl at the door sayin' that you did.
TB: I didn't mom. I promise.
me: **shaking my head** okay. but don't be callin these little jackasses names out here. I hate to have to go out there and hurt someone.

And I am pretty sure he didn't.

I go back to the door, and tell neighborhood girl that the boy is not coming out. Period.
And don't be knockin' on my door tryin' to get the boy caught up. And tell LaVonte if he has a problem to come knock on my door.

The boy is just like his mother. Always getting into some shit. Cracks me up.